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Law school is cliquey even with everything being online

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Despite hearing before about how law school is very cliquey, I didn't expect it, especially during a pandemic. I'm in 1L and I moved near campus despite school being entirely online. I met with a few classmates a handful of times in outdoor settings. However, a large group of those in my section were comfortable hanging out indoors-- something that I didn't feel safe doing. They quickly formed a clique where they frequently meet together and hold exclusive indoor events. It's hard to see them hang out together knowing that I was never invited to these events and it also makes me feel like I wasted money moving. 

Has anyone else experienced this? Any advice on how to not feel FOMO? I've attended zoom extra-curricular events and it's just not the same. There's no real sense of bonding. 

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23 minutes ago, lawstudent300 said:

Despite hearing before about how law school is very cliquey, I didn't expect it, especially during a pandemic. I'm in 1L and I moved near campus despite school being entirely online. I met with a few classmates a handful of times in outdoor settings. However, a large group of those in my section were comfortable hanging out indoors-- something that I didn't feel safe doing. They quickly formed a clique where they frequently meet together and hold exclusive indoor events. It's hard to see them hang out together knowing that I was never invited to these events and it also makes me feel like I wasted money moving. 

Has anyone else experienced this? Any advice on how to not feel FOMO? I've attended zoom extra-curricular events and it's just not the same. There's no real sense of bonding. 

I don't understand. Why not just ask them to hang out in a venue where you feel comfortable. If they say no and you want to be part of the clique, then do what the clique does - hangout indoors. 

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Life is cliquey, unfortunately. High school never really ends. All you can do is extend invitations for activities you feel more comfortable with. If they join you, great! If they don't, whatever. 

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Are they a clique, or does it only feel that way because they're not catering to you? 

You should tell them that you'd like to be included. If they don't, who cares? You're only 2.5 months into 1L, you'll find your group soon enough. 

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I definitely understand where you're coming from. It's only been two months of online law school and I haven't made many friends either. I wouldn't worry too much about cliques, since they would have appeared whether or not this semester was online. It's much more important to become friends with people with whom you genuinely get along. And ironically, the most popular people in my class have never even set foot on campus (not that it matters much). 

Edited by Astro
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45 minutes ago, Tagger said:

Are they a clique, or does it only feel that way because they're not catering to you? 

You should tell them that you'd like to be included. If they don't, who cares? You're only 2.5 months into 1L, you'll find your group soon enough. 

It's cliquey in the sense that it's the same group of people hanging out and even other people who have hung out with them indoors don't get invited to the hangouts. It just feels exclusionary. 

Having to enter law school online already feels isolating enough. To see this going on is another layer. While in a regular school year, I'd be able to find another group of friends, this year, everyone is scattered all around the world. After a whole day of Zoom classes, most people experience Zoom fatigue and don't want to go on another Zoom call just to socialize. 

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42 minutes ago, canuckfanatic said:

Life is cliquey, unfortunately. High school never really ends. All you can do is extend invitations for activities you feel more comfortable with. If they join you, great! If they don't, whatever. 

Off topic, but I told a non-law school friend about OCIs and how much emphasis is placed on "fit" in the formal recruits. They then commented on how cliquey legal practice must be and I was like, "huh, maybe you've got a point." 

All this to say that cliques are unavoidable and it is what it is.  

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I'm sorry that you are feeling left out. This year is challenging for everyone. I will say, though, that if this 'clique' is continuing to hang out together in a group indoors, stay away from them!  That is exactly the type of behaviour that is causing the current hotspots!

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Although I believe law school seems cliquey, like most things in life, I don't think this story is a good example. Based on your explanation, you're not being excluded because you're disliked, you're being excluded because you're not comfortable doing stuff that the rest of the group wants to do. If they're going indoors and you're not, and they know you're not gonna go, why would they keep inviting you? Honestly I'm shocked you made the move without expecting to be chilling with your classmates in indoor settings. Didn't you wanna go get drinks with people?

Edited by Syndicate03
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I don't know what you expect. The activities I did with my law school friends pre-COVID were "drink inside" or "drink outside". Given that the temperature is now rapidly dropping, and you don't want to be inside, you're not left with many options. 

Organize an outdoor excursion if you'd like, but the onus is on you to do so.

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I don't have any advice, just that I feel bad that you're in this situation. When I was in 1L, I also felt like cliques formed pretty quickly. Hopefully you can find a couple of people that you get along with and can hang out with outdoors or at coffee shops, etc. Unfortunately, socializing in general is hard right now when you're trying to avoid spending time with people indoors.

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This doesn't sound exclusionary - people can chose who they hang out with. Ask them to hang out directly if you want to but if they just want to stick to their group, that's their choice. Some people want to keep friend groups small at this time. It sucks but it sounds more like your perspective towards the situation is what needs to change. 

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On 10/23/2020 at 5:27 AM, canuckfanatic said:

Life is cliquey, unfortunately.

Yeah.  OP should wait until he gets a job.  Then the real office politics begins...

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