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LLawS

Dealing with the stress?

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I completely understand that this is a marathon process that takes patience. In fact, not having an acceptance yet isn’t even what’s giving me the bulk of my stress. It’s everything that comes with it. 

For example, because of the date of my lease, I need to give them an answer this week on whether we’d like our apartment for another year. Obviously I cannot commit to that because I might not be living in the province come September, so we’ll be giving up the opportunity to keep our apartment. It’s the not knowing where I’ll be living that’s stressing me out. 

Same with work, I’m applying for jobs (not restaurant/retail- but more “substantial” jobs) and am stressing out about disclosing that I may be returning to school. 

For me, the bulk of my stress is coming from not knowing where I’ll be living in a few months. Or, potentially needing to find a place in a province I’ve never even been to on really short notice. How do people handle this when it comes to waiting on school acceptances?

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I was in a similar position as you last month. My lease is up soon and I only have an acceptance offer from a university outside of my city, which means that I can't wait very long on my local university before I have to make a decision. It's really stressful!

My advice is to mitigate what you can. Explain the situation to your landlord and ask if there are month-to-month options. If you rent with a company that has properties in other areas, ask if they can transfer your lease should you have to move. You could even ask if a short term lease is an option. 

Also, if your current job pays the bills or you can otherwise get by I would advise that you not apply to jobs at all. If you do need to apply, I wouldn't mention that you "might" be going to law school. Why should they hire someone who might leave in a few months? Then if you don't get in, you're out of a job AND law school. Only tell them if you have a firm acceptance. 

For me, I know that I might not hear back until June, and that's not a lot of time to make plans and get settled before school starts. If I get waitlisted, that's as good as a rejection for me because of my living situation. I can't make plans based on maybes, and plans are what has kept the stress level down, personally.

Edited by RGoodfellow

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41 minutes ago, LLawS said:

I completely understand that this is a marathon process that takes patience. In fact, not having an acceptance yet isn’t even what’s giving me the bulk of my stress. It’s everything that comes with it. 

For example, because of the date of my lease, I need to give them an answer this week on whether we’d like our apartment for another year. Obviously I cannot commit to that because I might not be living in the province come September, so we’ll be giving up the opportunity to keep our apartment. It’s the not knowing where I’ll be living that’s stressing me out. 

Same with work, I’m applying for jobs (not restaurant/retail- but more “substantial” jobs) and am stressing out about disclosing that I may be returning to school. 

For me, the bulk of my stress is coming from not knowing where I’ll be living in a few months. Or, potentially needing to find a place in a province I’ve never even been to on really short notice. How do people handle this when it comes to waiting on school acceptances?

Can you not go on month to month? Or change the lease to expire Aug 30, 2019 with option to renew.

You don't have to disclose that you are going back to school until you get an offer.. 

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27 minutes ago, RGoodfellow said:

I was in a similar position as you last month. My lease is up soon and I only have an acceptance offer from a university outside of my city, which means that I can't wait very long on my local university before I have to make a decision. It's really stressful!

My advice is to mitigate what you can. Explain the situation to your landlord and ask if there are month-to-month options. If you rent with a company that has properties in other areas, ask if they can transfer your lease should you have to move. You could even ask if a short term lease is an option. 

Also, if your current job pays the bills or you can otherwise get by I would advise that you not apply to jobs at all. If you do need to apply, I wouldn't mention that you "might" be going to law school. Why should they hire someone who might leave in a few months? Then if you don't get in, you're out of a job AND law school. Only tell them if you have a firm acceptance. 

For me, I know that I might not hear back until June, and that's not a lot of time to make plans and get settled before school starts. If I get waitlisted, that's as good as a rejection for me because of my living situation. I can't make plans based on maybes, and plans are what has kept the stress level down, personally.

Thanks for this! It definitely helps. Unfortunately my building is really high in demand and only offers yearly leases. I might just look at alternative buildings just to be safe. But this has been my favorite place so far, so I’m kind of annoyed about giving it up if I end up getting in in the city at a later date

That makes sense! I actually haven’t been working the past 2 months but am ready to get another job- that’s why I’m looking now! I definitely don’t want to not work while I wait around for a response from schools. 

I just don’t like the stress of not having a plan!! 

16 minutes ago, Luckycharm said:

Can you not go on month to month? Or change the lease to expire Aug 30, 2019 with option to renew.

You don't have to disclose that you are going back to school until you get an offer.. 

No, my building only does yearly renewals! Believe me, I all but offered an arm to get an extension or a month-to-month. 

Edited by LLawS

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8 hours ago, LLawS said:

Thanks for this! It definitely helps. Unfortunately my building is really high in demand and only offers yearly leases. I might just look at alternative buildings just to be safe. But this has been my favorite place so far, so I’m kind of annoyed about giving it up if I end up getting in in the city at a later date

Aw jeez that really sucks :( I would definitely start looking for other buildings just in case, for sure. That sucks that you have to give them an answer now, though, and not closer to when your lease is up; if I'm understanding correctly, you have to tell them soon but your actual lease isn't up for a few months yet, right? Is there any way you could at least get them to defer that decision until closer to that date?

Good luck with the job hunt, by the way!

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I'm not going to get into giving legal advice here, but depending what province you live in, your landlord may not be able to force a renewal on you like that.  Your landlord may also not be able to unreasonably deny you the ability to sublet/assign the lease, even if they can force you to renew for a year.  Look into your rights.  Don't let your landlord try to dick you around.  They do it all the time.

Edited by ProfReader
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15 hours ago, Luckycharm said:

You don't have to disclose that you are going back to school until you get an offer..  

This might be true but I'd suggest being upfront about it. My employer, even though they were nice enough to let me work one last summer, would have been pissed if I failed to tell him I was planning on starting law school in the Fall.

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26 minutes ago, thedraper said:

This might be true but I'd suggest being upfront about it. My employer, even though they were nice enough to let me work one last summer, would have been pissed if I failed to tell him I was planning on starting law school in the Fall.

until you get an offer

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9 hours ago, RGoodfellow said:

Aw jeez that really sucks :( I would definitely start looking for other buildings just in case, for sure. That sucks that you have to give them an answer now, though, and not closer to when your lease is up; if I'm understanding correctly, you have to tell them soon but your actual lease isn't up for a few months yet, right? Is there any way you could at least get them to defer that decision until closer to that date?

Good luck with the job hunt, by the way!

Thank you!! Yeah, my lease technically ends on May 31, but they want an answer by this Friday. Which seems stupid because every other place I’ve lived in has given me until the end of February to respond. I’m going to try and talk to them again- especially since they gave us the notice saying we had to decide at the end of January. It’s not fair to only give us a few weeks. 

 

8 hours ago, ProfReader said:

I'm not going to get into giving legal advice here, but depending what province you live in, your landlord may not be able to force a renewal on you like that.  Your landlord may also not be able to unreasonably deny you the ability to sublet/assign the lease, even if they can force you to renew for a year.  Look into your rights.  Don't let your landlord try to dick you around.  They do it all the time.

That’s a good point- thanks- I will! I live in Nova Scotia but have only been here a few years and it’s different than Ontario so I definitely have to read up on it. 

 

2 hours ago, thedraper said:

This might be true but I'd suggest being upfront about it. My employer, even though they were nice enough to let me work one last summer, would have been pissed if I failed to tell him I was planning on starting law school in the Fall.

Yeah I mean I’m definitely not applying for any contract jobs, but would still rather have them aware of the possibility. 

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@LLawS That sounds like quite a difficult situation to be in. @ProfReader offered a good suggestion regarding the lease; maybe don't just read up on it, but ascertain good local legal advice on the matter. If Dalhousie offers you admission, I'm sure you'd rather stay in your current apartment, so why not do everything you can to stay put?

Also, employers are unlikely to hire a person that says, "I might be available until August, or I might be available until August 2020, but I won't know for sure until a law school notifies me." While it may seem unethical, I would not be upfront about this in an interview. I'd suggest only notifying your prospective employer as @Luckycharm said, after you receive an offer of admission. Otherwise, you may find it impossible to be hired.

Aside from the above advice, try your best to focus on aspects of your life that do not involve the uncertainty that comes with the law school admission process. Focus on you, living a healthy lifestyle, locating meaningful employment, etc. Many of life's situations and circumstances are largely out of your control, so instead, focus on areas and aspects of your life that are in your full and total control. Put your best foot forward, and good luck!!

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1 hour ago, futurelawyer2023 said:

@LLawS That sounds like quite a difficult situation to be in. @ProfReader offered a good suggestion regarding the lease; maybe don't just read up on it, but ascertain good local legal advice on the matter. If Dalhousie offers you admission, I'm sure you'd rather stay in your current apartment, so why not do everything you can to stay put?

Also, employers are unlikely to hire a person that says, "I might be available until August, or I might be available until August 2020, but I won't know for sure until a law school notifies me." While it may seem unethical, I would not be upfront about this in an interview. I'd suggest only notifying your prospective employer as @Luckycharm said, after you receive an offer of admission. Otherwise, you may find it impossible to be hired.

Aside from the above advice, try your best to focus on aspects of your life that do not involve the uncertainty that comes with the law school admission process. Focus on you, living a healthy lifestyle, locating meaningful employment, etc. Many of life's situations and circumstances are largely out of your control, so instead, focus on areas and aspects of your life that are in your full and total control. Put your best foot forward, and good luck!!

Thanks! Yeah, but unfortunately as I've thought about it, I've realized I don't think I'm confident enough to stick around and wait for Dal to accept me. It's not that I think I have no shot, it's just that I'm not confident enough to sign my lease or potentially let other offers expire (if I received one that expired before I heard from Dal). With this in mind though, I will definitely be doing everything I can to receive an extension on deciding on our apartment. Though I doubt I'll hear from Dal by the end of February, but here's hoping. 

As for jobs, I think I've decided that I won't offer the information, but I won't lie either. If they flat out ask me if I have plans to return to school, I'll say I've applied but haven't heard back- but I won't offer it up myself. 

That's good advice- I think I'll just do my best not to worry and trust that things will work out! This is a stressful process but I'm not the first or last person to find myself in this position, and obviously, people get through this! Thank you for the advice! 

Edited by LLawS

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23 minutes ago, LLawS said:

Thanks! Yeah, but unfortunately as I've thought about it, I've realized I don't think I'm confident enough to stick around and wait for Dal to accept me. It's not that I think I have no shot, it's just that I'm not confident enough to sign my lease or potentially let other offers expire (if I received one that expired before I heard from Dal). With this in mind though, I will definitely be doing everything I can to receive an extension on deciding on our apartment. Though I doubt I'll hear from Dal by the end of February, but here's hoping. 

As for jobs, I think I've decided that I won't offer the information, but I won't lie either. If they flat out ask me if I have plans to return to school, I'll say I've applied but haven't heard back- but I won't offer it up myself. 

That's good advice- I think I'll just do my best not to worry and trust that things will work out! This is a stressful process but I'm not the first or last person to find myself in this position, and obviously, people get through this! Thank you for the advice! 

10 years from now, you wouldn't even remember how stressful you were.

Good luck

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1 minute ago, Luckycharm said:

10 years from now, you wouldn't even remember how stressful you were.

Good luck

Don't I know it, haha! Thank you!  

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Just wanted to thank you guys again! I was able to convince my landlord to actually give me even more time than I’m legally entitled to to make a decision!! 

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1 hour ago, LLawS said:

Just wanted to thank you guys again! I was able to convince my landlord to actually give me even more time than I’m legally entitled to to make a decision!! 

good for you.

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